It happened.

 I did it.  Yep.  No denying it.

New Year's Day, I decided that I'm going to spend the day dressed up.  

The back story:  We've been on a bit of a spending spree lately.  We have bought items from auction houses for about 30 years to resell.  One of the auction houses we've dealt with has stopped selling loose item lots and stopped doing live, in-person auctions while shifting to a focus on higher end estate liquidations and online auctions of return items from companies like Amazon and retail returns from places like Target or Kohls. We've bought one pallet lot from Liquidation dot com and made some money from the things we'd purchased.  

Some of the items we recently purchased were a size 2x maroon dress and a shoulder length red/orange wig.  This, along with nylons, heeled sandals and massive breast forms was what I wore to my ex-wife's house for the annual celebration.  It was nice.  It was fun.  I was comfortable.  In attendance were:  my ex, her gentleman friend and the two adult offspring.  My ex asked if I was uncomfortable in the nylons.  I wasn't.  She also said that my legs looked great in the hosiery.  I think my youngest got my legs!  Their legs are shaped the same as mine.  The five of us all enjoyed the afternoon and evening.  I will say that to the kids, I'm still Dad. To the ex-wife and her gentleman friend, I'm not known as Heather but rather my birth name.  Yes, it was odd/weird to be called that while wearing a nice dress... but I believe no evil intent was meant by it.  When I was getting ready, I made a point of not taking any male clothes.  I could have no backup plan and no way to chicken out.  I had my dress, a cape to keep me warm and my back-up clothes were leggings, my oversized top and a pair of flats. She had told me to wear whatever I was comfortable wearing.  I did and wll again in the future..

Another thing, my current wife and I are going to therapy.  We both have things that need to be worked on so we decided to try to seek a way to resolve the things that are amiss.  In the interest of honesty and openness with our therapist, I told her about my life as Heather.  At this week's session, I chose to wear the same clothes I wore to Christmas.  My wife was a bit uncomfortable because she's not sure leggings are ever appropriate plus she thinks I was too visible...Black leggings with a long shirt, my parts should be pretty well concealed.  I told the therapist about going to the New Year party and she said Heather needs to come to the next session.  I am all for that idea but my wife may be unsure ...

This day, January 1 2022

We've been invited dinner at the home of my ex-wife and daughters.  The guest list includes my ex, our two daughters her gentleman friend, and who knows who else.  I went for Thanksgiving. The above people and her brother, his wife and their son were there.  After they left, I got my bag of girl clothes from the van and put on leggings and a pink blouse.  I went on Christmas; the brother and family weren't there.  I wore the same leggings with an oversized purple top. I was very comfortable.

I've said it before, everyone can get along. There is tolerance in our relationship. I think that I'm supposed to be angry at my ex but I can't be that way. 

My wife will stay home. She doesn't always like traveling three hours round-trip just to eat. Being on a diuretic sucks and when there is anxiety too, it's even harder to navigate social interactions.

I really want to wear something nice today.  I'm seriously considering wearing my pretty dress. I just don't care.  I also have a new dress that was bought from an auction doing Amazon returns.  I think the style of this new dress is "Body Con."  I tried it on, if I pad myself and fill it properly it looks okay. If something happens to it and I spill something, no biggie.  It cost a couple dollars.

Time to get ready.

Happy New Year.

Heather

What may happen?

 A friend posted on the evil social media website about an event happening in the near future.

It is happening at a gay bar. The friend is a married woman. I know her professionally. 

I think I may have been to a gay bar once back in the '90's. The local chapter of Tri ESS held a meeting at an old bar in Vegas. I don't really remember what happened there. It would have been the second time I'd been to one of their meetings, the first was at someone's home. I didn't dress up for either event. The house one was in the afternoon or during daylight hours and the one at the bar was in the evening, maybe around dusk? I don't remember going anything again with Tri ESS after that.

I attended some adult events around that time, too. The Las Vegas Fetish and Fantasy Halloween Ball was quite a wild event. I think I went four times. The first time, solo. Dressed in a short pleather skirt, white blouse, black vest, 4" heels (which I still have and have worn to work).  The second time I went with a male friend. Pretty much the same outfit. After my divorce, I went for the third time. I placed an online personal ad for a companion, met a woman named Terrie and the two of us decided on a theme. Babies. We found one piece pajamas in pink and blue. There was zero chemistry. It was just a night out. The last time I went was probably in 2000 or 2001. The event had scaled back and instead of being in the convention area of a hotel, it was in a nightclub. "Jerry Tarkanian's Shark Tank." Just north of the MGM Grand hotel on the Las Vegas Strip. I had stopped dressing by then so I chose to buy a caveman outfit like a one shouldered dress. I cut the to portion to cover less of my torso and shortened it by about six inches. The original length was around my knee and I shortened it to just long enough to cover everything and not be scandalous. Under that I had a leopard print g-string and I had a purse to carry my ID money and credit card.  I'd parked at the MGM parking garage. To be able to walk from the garage, through the casino, up the sidewalk and into the nightclub I wore a a tee shirt and sweat pants over my caveman outfit.  I used the facility's coat check to store my sweats and tee shirt. At the end of my night, I went back to the coatcheck, collected my street clothes, took off my caveman outfit (remember, under was just a g-string) and pulled on my real clothes.

The upcoming event sounds like a mixture of a drag show, a comedy show, a game show and stripping? Sprinkled liberally with some adult beverages.

I'm not the "liberal adult beverages" type but more the I may have one or two and be the designated driver four hours later type.

The thing is that she's aware of my dressing for the October holiday and it would be a fun time to attend this as Heather. I am halfway tempted to do this "just because."

The woman who was instrumental in hiring me loved bingo. When she retired, we had a standing date to go to a drag queen bingo event but then COVID hit and her health isn't great so we've never had a chance to go out but I absolutely would show up in a dress or skirt for bingo with her. I know she's an ally. We'd talked about trans people before she retired and she told me about her former nephew who is now her niece and how she loves that they're happy living their authentic life.

I have to put time aside to go to drag queen bingo. It is very important, she's not getting younger. And yes, if the possibility of going to the show at the gay bar comes up I'll be there.

Will I dress up? Time will tell.

Have a nice week.

Heather.

Friday night!

 I've worked overtime for about six weeks. 

I AM TIRED.

Ten hours per day, five days per week excepting two paid holidays: The day Nevada became a state, observed on the last Friday of October and Veterans Day. 

I have gone to work at six AM and worked until five PM and suffered through everything the long hours brought to the table.

Getting to work for six means I have to be awake at 4:30 AM with a goal of being in bed by ten PM. At the beginning I was not very good at getting to bed on time. In the last few weeks I did much better until yesterday. We had appointments in Vegas. The last appointment was at 8 PM we got out at nearly 10 PM and after the drive, arrived home around 11:30.  We had made a stop at Costco so there were perishable items in the car that couldn't be left in the car overnight so after unloading and getting the medicine into our elderly kitty I finally hit my pillow at midnight.

Today was the last day of overtime, at least for now.

What does tomorrow bring? Another busy day. I'll be volunteering. Another long day. Starting at 7 AM but hopefully it'll only last until 3.

I hope Sunday will bring a day where I can have recreational time.

I say all this because we all need to remember to make time for ourselves. Don't drive yourself to an overload, it isn't worth it. 

As I'm sitting here, the old kitty is staring at me. He's demanding dinner.

Good night, y'all.

Heather. 

Just a quick message!

Hi friends! Good Sunday morning to all. Have a fantastic Halloween. 

 I've had a few chances to be out and about within the past few weeks. My daughters, ex-wife and I went to the Vegas Pride parade on October 8. I wore my favorite sundress, youngest offspring wore her rainbow skirt. It was a fun event. I'd never been to a parade in Nevada, never been to a pride event and never been out with my ex-wife dressed as Heather. The parade was amazing. So many groups and companies participated in the parade. It made me want to ask if there was any plan for my employer to participate in a future event. After the parade, the four of us went to eat at a nearby IHOP. I had low expectations for the food but was pleasantly surprised. Six Dollars for a burger and fries on their 6 - 10pm value meal menu. And it was a good tasting burger! The only compensation I received for this endorsement was a burger that tasted good which we paid for. It was a nice evening.

 
The next day, 10/9 was the Las Vegas Pride event. Again, I'd never been to a pride festival. I had fun. Again I wore my favorite dress. It's nice to be recognized and not misgendered in a public setting. Yes, of course at a Pride event the likelihood of misgendering is low but it was confidence building. We spent probably five hours there. The only bummer was that the vegan food stall we'd chosen had run out of food. The three of us had split up, one kid at one stall and me and the other at a vegan place. the only thing left at the vegan place were cookies and they didn't have singles for change. The other kid was successful in getting food all three of us, fortunately.

One week later was the Las Vegas Age of Chivalry Renaissance Fair. I wore my standard "peasant" attire. I have a brown cotton skirt and a green/black embroidered blouse that my ex-wife gave me when the kids and I went to Pirate fest. Dang, I was glad we wore face masks at the Ren fair! There was so much dust. If I hadn't worn a mask, I'd be kicking dirt out of my respiratory system for many days. When I'd gone to the Ren fair a couple years ago, I was mis-gendered a couple times so I'd held low expectations... This year, nobody misgendered me. Not once. Zip. Nada. We had quite a few encounters with vendors and some seemed to acknowledge and embrace our unique traits. I had a great time. Based on the huge crowd, people were itching to get outside and attend events. The place was packed, food vendors had lines for days and the beer wagon lines were even longer. I don't think they expected to be as busy as they were. Again, we split into two lines to order food. The hungriest kid with me in the "deep fried stuff" line which was the shortest food line and youngest in the Pizza line. From the deep fried vendor, I had a fried "PBJ Uncrustable," hungriest got fried Nutella and fried cannoli. The three of us shared each of the fried goodies. Pizza was ordered and plated, we somehow found one side of a picnic table was available and had a fun little feast.

I've been pushing my look a little at a time. When I go out, I almost always wear my largest breast forms under a padded bra with a thin undershirt and then an open button shirt. If I'm wearing a baseball cap and mask, I am certainly passing. Yesterday, I went to our local supermarket. I wore an underwire bra with my biggest breastforms (DD's), men's tee shirt, women's shorts, dangling Halloween cat earrings, painted nails. As I was at the self checkout, the woman behind me was offered to use a different machine when she turned to the man offering her to go ahead and said about me, "she's almost done, thanks anyway." Oh my! I was on cloud nine. it was fabulous to be seen in my conservative little town for the person I really am.

 
On a similar but different topic, our office never received approval from the big bosses to dress up for Halloween. No crossdressing at work for me. Womp, womp. Halloween Cancelled?! I've participated every year since 2016. Each year a bit more over the top but always within dress code. People were truly disappointed that the costumes they'd bought or created would not be used. My direct boss texted me Wednesday night that we'd not be able to dress up. When I'd gotten to work Thursday, she told me that she half expected me to be dressed up regardless of the official directive. Dress code says specific guidelines but they're not affixed to a gender. I'd said that "who knows, I may just find a nice dress or skirt to wear as long as I'm within dress code." I didn't. The best part was that so many co-workers were disappointed because they love seeing how good I look on Halloween. Again, what a nice confidence builder. Who knows... maybe... just maybe... I'll just do it.

Once again I offer wishes of a fantastic Halloween to all. Get out there and live your authentic self.

Thanks for stopping in, come again.
Aloha,
Heather

Um...

Looking at the update prior to today, I guess I did go over my plans! I did see some of the in-law family! Didn't see the wife's sister but did visit the brother and his wife and went the house of a friend of his for a fantastic dinner and playing some board games. So much to remember!

News from the world of Heather.

Hello friends and visitors.

It is September 5. Two months have passed since I visited my blog but much has happened.  I have a "new to me" desktop PC and before I switched from old to new, I failed to get my passwords copied and had been sort of locked out by the new PC.  Today was the day I said "I need to fire up that old PC and tell the world what's happened in the last two months.

I thought I had shared with the world that I was going to visit my parents on the east coast but in reading my two most recent blog updates, see nothing. 

So, I went to see the old folks. Mom will be 83 later this month and Dad's 82 as of May.  I'd planned on flying, like I usually do... I could swing the price of air fare since I'd bought a ticket last summer and cancelled when states back east started locking down. It would have been a couple hundred for the portion not covered by the credit.  When I tried renting a car in Hartford, I discovered that it would be about $1800 for the eighteen days I'd planned to get the cheapest/smallest thing available.  That wouldn't work.

I looked into the employee discount page from my employer. The have a link to renting "campervans" from a company based in Australia, New Zealand, California and Las Vegas.  I looked at the vehicles they offer. One is a passenger minivan which could be rented with full camping gear like tents, cots, portable stoves and coolers.  Well, I own all of that stuff, right up to the minivan but I didn't want to drive our van cross-country, though. It's my wife's car and she'd be miserable in my old Honda CRV for 2+ weeks.  I called the campervan people and asked about rental, discounts, mileage fees, talked it over with my wife and booked the vehicle the next day.  I drove across the North American Continent from Nevada, about 5 miles from the CA border to Mount Washington, NH and back with lots of adventure in-between.  

It was pleasing to stop at scenic areas in Utah, taking selfies while wearing the same sundress I'd worn to Rocky Horror!  Yeah, it's overexposed and a bit blurred but it was the first time using the selfie stick in a couple years.

Heather in Utah

There was some rain along the way which allowed for some interesting photos.  

Rain in the distance

Along the way, I
did some railfanning.  Stopping in Kearney NE at the crossing with a Virtual Railfan camera. At the time, my wife, her brother and some friends were playing boardgames online and I was an interruption.  I was just wearing a tee shirt and shorts, couldn't tell that my bra was stuffed with my D sized breast forms.  It was evening and the sun was backlighting me but I managed to get a screenshot. I'm the blur in the lower left quadrant.

Kearney NE Virtual Railfan crossing.

If you've read my previous postings, my family is in Massachusetts but my sister had taken vacation when I was there so she could have a break from worrying about our parents. She and her husband went to Lincoln, NH for about a week. They'd invited me up for a day and we went to Mount Washington.  That was a great place. Cold. Windy. Great fun. Glad I had warm clothes in the van!  I'd never been up.  We took my van up the AutoRoad. It's funny, the rental contract said "no dirt roads," no Death Valley between May and October but nothing about the highest point in New England and yes, there as a stretch of the AutoRoad that is unpaved. Didn't know until I got to it!

Mount Washington, NH

It was a nice visit. Got things done at my parents' house that needed doing but they were incapable of doing because of their age.  Dump runs, getting things ready to go to a metal scrapper, prepping for home improvement projects.  I try to bring my parents to places they've never seen or been to.  One trip, we did the Capitol Buildings in Hartford and Boston.  This year, we had planned on eating at a favorite Chinese restaurant but forgot it was a Tuesday so... closed.  Lots of things not open midweek.   

A week an a half after I'd arrived, it was time to say goodbye for now.  

My maple tree!

Here's the maple tree that stood guard over my bedroom when I was growing up.  It had been given a trimming by a tree company while I was there. Limbs were growing aver the house and the family didn't want one to fall on the roof.  As a kid, I played under that tree many times.  The family tapped it for maple syrup, too. Mom's clothesline is still attached to the tree and the original clothesline rail has grown into the tree.

My trip was nice, on the way out I stopped at the rail museum in Danbury, CT but it was closed. I still got a selfie.  Lots of places were closed mid-week.  

Danbury CT depot

It was a great trip.  I put nearly 7000 miles on the rented van in 2 1/2 weeks.  When not at my parents' house, I slept on my cot in the van, parked in truck stop parking lots and used the trucker's showers at Love's travel centers.  The van performed admirably and delivered phenomenal fuel economy averaging about 28 mpg with posted highway speeds of 75 - 80 mph.  All in, I spent just over $2000 on my trip. Food, fuel, showers, vehicle and taxes. AND... I still have my credit for a couple hundred dollars for air fare.  

Full disclosure, I didn't spend my entire drive fully dressed as Heather.  I needed to feel comfortable and safe with my surroundings and if there was going to be some kind of crowd, I toned her down. But I DID wear my biggest breast forms for the entire travel portion.  Tee shirt or button up, the girls went along.

Next time, I have to figure out how not to be sneering or exhibiting my RBF when I take a selfie.

That's it.

Thanks for stopping by!

Until next time, Much Love,

Heather

ps: Hey look! I figured out how to include photos in my blog!